Tuesday, June 30, 2009
A Thankful Tuesday!
I find that I complain too much lately, maybe I am getting older and grumpier, or maybe I am tired and just need an hour or two more of sleep every night, or maybe the world is just not cooperating with me as much anymore and I feel the need to shout it from the rooftops. Here and now, though, I am making a concerted effort, for at least the remaining days of summer, to work a bit harder at the finding happy moments portion of my life and skip the complaining part.
It's a Tuesday and I am thankful for so much; for my family and the fact that my parents just live a few miles down the road; for my husband who works really hard and is finally going to have a weekend off this week; for my daughter, who even though she tries my patience in every form these days, is still the joy of my life and the reason I am; for my friends, who listen and encourage and make me laugh!
I am thankful for the ability to buy what we need, when we need it; the comfort of my home; the new paint that is going on my walls and all the fun of redecorating; for music and my piano, and for the little things of life like "knock, knock" jokes and the chocolate push-ups we got introduced to this afternoon.
I am thankful for the heartbeats of those I love (or heartbeeps, as Hannah says!!) and bubble baths and that sweet bunny rabbit that wandered on my porch this morning; for the dogs barking in the yard and the birds that sang to us as we were swimming today.
There is so much to be happy about and thankful for in this world, life is so swift and seems to pass by in the blink of an eye. I am trying hard to not take a moment for granted...hoping the same for you!
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Monday, June 29, 2009
Kissing Frogs...Literally!
Let me start by saying this... my mother hates frogs, she is scared of them, grossed out by them and just generally thinks they have no place in this world. Consequently, everyone she knows gives her frogs in many forms, fake ones of course, but it is fun. We torture her...and now, her favorite grandchild has jumped in on the froggy fun.
Lately, every time we wander into Walmart, she heads for the dollar aisle and loves to pick out a "squishy" bug or snake or turtle...and the other day, she found a frog. She just fell in love with it and all its green squishness. She especially wanted to get it because "MeMa doesn't like frogs and won't it be fun to show her!" Those were her exact words...she loves her MeMa - truly she does, but she loves a good scare and joke as well. And she has tortured my mother with that frog to no end. She carries him with her everywhere...and yes, last week, she "introduced" him to my friends, even letting one of my friends hold him for a bit while she (Hannah) played in the playroom at Chick-fil-a. It was a moment of extreme trust...she doesn't let just anyone play with her frog! I believe my friend has passed the Hannah test!
Tonight she asked me to take some pictures of her frog and his new friend. Yes, we have a new frog to add to the collection... he (she??) is blue...and according to Hannah they are married. Thank goodness, we wouldn't want any unwed frogs in our midst...mainly because they were kissing each other a minute ago and we frown on that behavior from frogs that are not married, or at the very least engaged!!
I couldn't help but laugh when I saw my friend's comment about the frog since I was in the midst of taking wedding pictures of the frogs at that moment. So, here are the pictures. I hope you all enjoy them, that is everyone but my mother.
As the ceremony begins...
Yes, this is how we spend our evenings...somebody come rescue me!!! :-)
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Sunday, June 28, 2009
The Women in My Life
Driving home from the Chick-Fil-a, I couldn't help but think of how wonderful it is to be a woman in this world. I know that it seems as if men have all the advantages, higher salaries for the most part, less domestic responsibility, etc, etc, etc, but I think we woman are really the lucky ones. We are born communicators, we have the ability to cultivate intimate friendships in a very short time and we are built for the compassion and care needed to nurture those friendships. I am not sure that men really get that opportunity, at least not in the same way we women get to experience it. It makes me sad for them, but so grateful for my place as a woman in this world.
No matter how many men come and go in our lives our women friends are always there. We are there for each other in happy times and sad times, we encourage and boost up and listen and give advice to each other. Every dark and dreary time and every happy, joyful moment in my life has been met by a female friend and made all the better for it. What would I do without them in my life? I don't ever want to find out.
So, thank you to my extended "family" for hanging out with me and mine last week, thanks to my girlfriends who keep me sane everyday through phone calls, computer feedback and lunch dates and thanks to my mom who has been the best girl friend I could ever have.
Living Happily in the Moment!
Bev
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Painting My Heart Out!
Here are some pictures of the finished hall and foyer.
What do you think? Sometimes it pays to get all anxiety-ridden and stressed out and pour that energy into some big project, don't you think?
Finished hallway.
Foyer seeing through to the hallway
Foyer, view from the great room!Living Happily in the Moment!
Bev
Thursday, June 25, 2009
When God Closes One Door, He Opens a Paint Can...Or Something Like That!
Without much forethought, armed only with a paint swatch or two from my idea book, the checkbook and the child, I took off for the paint store. I spent a great deal of time picking out a brush or two, some paint rollers, a tray and some nifty paint tray liners, what a concept, then boldly asked for ....a sample of my favorite color. I know...living life on the edge! But it just didn't seem right to buy a whole gallon of the stuff, if I got it home and HATED it!!!
After we left with our purchase, we ate lunch at Sonic..such a treat to find the box of "toys" and crayons and coloring books they had set up for the kids to enjoy. It was HOT, but Hannah and I loved our meal and really enjoyed the strawberry milkshake after we were done!! Her pet "frog" really enjoyed the flies that buzzed around us the whole time as well. (oh, the frog is fake...I haven't flipped out that much!!)
Once we got home, I got right to work preparing the back hallway for its makeover. I cleaned the wall and got rid of some ..uh...cobwebs!!!! and then tried out the color. Hannah gave it a thumbs up and I really like it myself. I am just as excited as can be about this project. It is just what I need...a restful week or two of standing on a ladder and painting my whole house! Yep, that should do the trick. Tomorrow we will journey back for a whole gallon of the stuff and the real fun shall begin!
Here are some pictures of the paint in progress...it is called Antelope Hide. I have never seen an antelope with golden hide, actually, don't even recall ever seeing an antelope, but I trust the people at Valspar know what they are talking about.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009
Celebrating a Life
Today, to honor my friend, I am including a few of my favorite pictures of my friends, Thomas included and some of the funnier times we all had together. Thanks for indulging me and my memories today.
I love that he is smiling in all the pictures (yes, even the one with him up HIGH on that roof, I just know he was smiling) he was always positive, friendly, fun and a great friend. He was one of the good guys and this world is a sadder place without him around. I wish you all could have known him. I cherish all my memories, especially today.
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
It Is A Crazy Life...But Its Their Life...Let's All Leave Them Alone!
Jon and Kate Plus Eight is possibly the saddest train wreck on television these days. I have watched the show since its debut...after all, the sextuplets are only four months older than my Hannah Joy (they have a Hannah Joy as well!) and watching them handle all the stages of life that come with babies, and preschoolers times six, not to mention the older twin girls, well, it just made life seem so much easier for this tired mommy. I could also identify with a frazzled mom and wife, yelling and being a bit unreasonable with regard to her well-meaning husband. Usually he would come in the door, after a crazy day for her, and then some sort of silly argument would ensue. I understood it, I understood it cause it happened to me all the time. I even understood the yelling and irrational behavior out in public, oh, not the kids, I am talking about the mom and yes, even the dad. They were raising eight children for heaven sake. Who wouldn't be stressed. It definitely made my life seem a breeze, after all, I just had one. Okay, one that seems like four or five at times, but still, there was only one high chair, one set of toys, one child's worth of laundry. I counted my blessing and watched for some much needed comic relief and dose of reality. That is until this year...
Rumors have floated, tabloids have had field days, unless you are just "out of the loop" there is no need to expand on it all here. The season premiere of the show left me sad. Two people, lost and drifted apart, their marriage seemingly over, sitting separately and then together on a couch for camera men and all of the world to watch them answer questions bitterly and dissolve into tears. It was heartbreaking. And then tonight's episode, probably even more so. They announced that the papers had been signed to dissolve the marriage. It was horrific to watch and yet, I couldn't turn off the television. I kept hoping they would say that the show would be over. But no, they are prepared to continue...but separately. How sad, how heartwrenching.
Now, instead of watching two parents cope with a life of raising such an extraordinary family, we will watch and see how divorce affects them, and even worse, how it affects the children. It is so sad to me...I know I can't watch anymore.
I know lots of people are deciding who should be blamed, Jon, Kate, TLC for airing it, the public for watching, the tabloid photographers, it really doesn't matter. The problems in their marriage weren't born because of the fame and fortune, I have a feeling they were already there and all of this just heightened it. Perhaps, as Kate says, this was inevitable with the world watching or not. We don't know and it is wrong to speculate. All I know is that marriage is hard, babies or not, world watching or not, it is hard. I know the feeling of watching a marriage spin out of control, I know the feeling of sitting in a counselor's office and picking apart life, he said, she said, etc. I have been there, and thankfully my situation so far has worked out differently. I can't imagine dealing with it all while running from a photographer or sitting in front of a camera and knowing that millions of people are watching. Their tag line for the show opening has always been, "it may be a crazy life, but it is our life" and tonight I agree, it is their life and it is crazy and they should be left alone not exploited by everyone (including themselves) for money and profit and gossip.
Last night, for me anyway, was the last night of the show. It is just too sad to watch and I tend to watch television to escape. It is definitely reality television! I will pray for Jon and Kate and their plus eight. I hope you do too.
Living Happily in the Moment!
Bev
Monday, June 22, 2009
Bagels For Breakfast...Anyone?
I did not grow up with bagels in the house. Oh, I knew what they were, it was just not a grocery item my mother ever bought. My first bagel encountered happened the first week I started work at a local medical company as a customer service rep. Our offices were downtown and half a block's walk from a bakery, long known in town for it culinary delights. I remember one of the first days after I joined the staff, about nine o'clock, a co-worker called and wanted to know if I wanted a bagel. I wanted to fit in and I was feeling a little mid-morning hunger pang, so I said yes. She appeared a few minutes later at my door with two small bagels on a napkin and a little pat of butter. She placed them in my hands; they were warm and smelled wonderful. After buttering one, I proceeded to take my first bite and oh my, how delicious. It was squishy and soft and buttery and melt in your mouth good. From that bite on, I was hooked. Every morning, I skipped the breakfast part of my "getting ready for work" routine and happily looked forward to morning breakfast time over a bag of bagels with my co-workers. Even though I am quite certain that bag of bagels was just as disastrous to our waistlines as a box of donuts might have been, we still felt healthier because they came from a quaint, German bakery!!
Now, it has been years and years since I have wandered into that bakery, lazily ordering a bag of bagels for an office full of hungry professionals, but every time I buy a bag of bagels at the grocery store and try in vain to warm one of them up in the microwave I am reminded of that time in my life and I long for the simplicity of a small, soft and warm Sunshine Bakery bagel. It was a great way to start a day!
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Happy Father's Day!
Hope everyone has a great Father's Day!!
Living Happily In The Moment!
Bev and Hannah Joy, the real Sleeping Beauty!
Saturday, June 20, 2009
It Was A Good Day!
After Bible School, Hannah and I spent some time doing a little shopping for Father's Day and then we met up with some friends for a fun visit and some ice cream. I have to brag on my little one, she was hot and tired and had been drug around town all afternoon, but in the restaurant she was as good as gold. She played so well by herself, ate her ice cream and colored in her new Spongebob coloring book, allowing me to actually visit and chat and finish a sentence. It was an extraordinary occurrence. I am so proud of her.
After we said our goodbyes, she was exhausted and of course fell asleep on the way home. She is still snoozing away and I have a feeling she will be sleeping through the night since it is late and dark and she is not stirring at all. I think Vacation Bible School just wears her out!! Pity it only lasts a week.
I hope you had a wonderful Friday and are looking forward to a great Father's Day weekend. It is hot where I live...I hope it is a bit cooler for all of you!!!
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Friday, June 19, 2009
And the Thunder Rolled...
So, with that said, enjoy this piece. I hope you can find something to relate to within its paragraphs. Part of my rest from the blog was to give me some space to come back and write in all different forms, this post is a bit of allegory and fiction. and a tiny bit of memoir, so, please....don't send the men in the white coats out for me just yet!!
And The Thunder Rolled...
I am writing this in the midst of a storm, it seems both a literal and a figurative one. The storm raging outside my door tonight is fierce. The wind is blowing the tall pine trees almost to the ground, the rain is beating against all the windows in this house and I am sorely rethinking the choice to have had big over sized windows as part of this construction. There are leaves and sticks flying across the yard as if someone were flinging them purposely toward some unseen target. The thunder is rolling around me; if it were darker I am sure I would see the shards of lightening blazing through the clouds. We had a storm like this last night and once again, it is rolling through our area.
Thankfully according to our weather forecaster, this is a brief storm and although the power is out and making life a little inconvenient at the moment, the storm is slated to pass over my little house shortly and I am confident that all will be restored soon and life will continue.
If only all storms were like this one. The other storms rolling through my life these days are not so sure and predictable. There is change blowing through like that raging wind, and most days I can truly identify with these pretty
I have hope though. Just as the storm is now passing by and there is calm once again to the world outside my window, I know that sooner or later, there will be calm inside my heart as well. I feel that coming too. I have hope and it is like that ray of sunshine now flooding my once dark home.
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
See ya later, Alligator!
Those of you who read everyday know that I have been having a bit of the writer's block. If you are back again today after what has been a disastrous week (as far as my writing is concerned) and reading this...BLESS YOU. You are brave and loyal souls.
I am just going to throw in the towel and take a break. Perhaps a designated break is what I need to get the obstacles and cobwebs out of the way. Now, don't think I am really going away, I will be writing everyday - but the pressure to produce a blog post will just be lifted. Hopefully I will be back by the weekend. That is my goal anyway. I just need a break, from this blog, from a few other situations in my world as well.
See ya on the flip side!
Bev
A Survey, Or Just An Excuse For Not Writing...Again!
Thanks for taking the time to check in here, hopefully soon the material will get better. My writing muse, like Elvis, seems to have left the building...hoping it will wander back around soon!
I Am
lonely tonight
I Want
to be inspired
I Have
more than I could ever ask for
I Wish
I could go back for just a bit
I Hate
chaos in my head
I Fear
losing those I love
I Hear
voices in my head
I Search
no more
I Wonder
all the time
I Regret
nothing!
I Love
him
I Ache
for her
I Always
will
I Usually
talk too much
I Am Not
terribly shy
I Dance
when no one is looking
I Sing
when no one is listening
I Never
thought it would be this way
I Rarely
cry
I Cry
only over the most important things
I Am Not Always
happy
I Lose
my cool
I'm Confused
about it sometimes
I Need
more
I Should
not want more
I Dream
of more
HAHAHA!
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Monday, June 15, 2009
This Post Is So Boring, It Doesn't Even Deserve a Title!
Sunday was spent in peace...slept late, watched the 'Bridges of Madison County' (okay, that was a mistake!!) and ate lunch with my parents. I was happily reunited with my child who had spent the night in grandparent heaven. After lunch, we came home and settled in for some quiet time together on the couch. She is such a joy to me...no matter what the turmoil inside my head and heart, her silliness and loving arms and kisses always seem to bring me back around to the lucky reality that is my life.
Today, being Monday, brings about the week of Vacation Bible School at our church. I am not working this year, so I will be dropping off my Bible Student and getting a little mommy "free time" all week. I would be telling a big one if I said I am not just a little excited ... maybe I will get some gab time with girlfriends, or at the very least just get to grocery shop alone.
Here's hoping you have a great Monday...oh and I read yesterday that Krispy Kreme is in danger of closing, so if there is one thing I can encourage you to do today -- please, for all that is sane and sacred in this world...go buy a donut!! We can't lose Krispy Kreme folks, we just can't lose that!
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Sunday, June 14, 2009
Sunday Sampler: A Purpose Under The Sun
To everything there is a season,
a time for every purpose under the sun.
A time to be born and a time to die;
a time to plant and a time to pluck up that which is planted;
a time to kill and a time to heal ...
a time to weep and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn and a time to dance ...
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing;
a time to lose and a time to seek;
a time to rend and a time to sew;
a time to keep silent and a time to speak;
a time to love and a time to hate;
a time for war and a time for peace.
Living Happily In the Moment
Bev
Saturday, June 13, 2009
Why?
Why do you read this blog? Are you are a friend or family member? Are you the friend of a friend? Perhaps you live far away and don't even know me in the real world? It matters not to me, honestly, I am just happy you show up and read.
But why do I show up here everyday? That is the real question in my brain. I started this blog as a part writing experiment, part journal, part scrapbook of words to document my child's life. I have always wanted to write. As a young girl I was an avid reader. I went on many adventures with Pipi Longstockings and Nancy Drew and I learned all about life along with Laura Ingalls in her Little House on the Praire. During my high school years I became acquainted with the classics; Shakespeare, Hardy, Browning, all captured my imagination. I never quite knew how writing would fit into my life, but I always knew that I wanted to write. I remember meeting someone who was a wife and a mother, active in her community and yet still found the time to write a monthly article for a local magazine. In my eyes she had the best of all the worlds, the ability to mother and make a home, and the ability to share her perspective with the world. I found an old journal entry not too long ago where I had actually written out my desire to do just that in my own life.
I have not had a traditional "writing" career. I have written lots of memos and letters, bulletins and corporate newsletters, procedure manuals and employee handbooks. It seems every position I have held in the "corporate" world has somehow led to me being the writer on the team.
After becoming a stay at home mom, I needed that outlet once again in my life and that is when I discovered blogging. I was an avid reader of several blogs for about six months before I took the plunge and started one of my own. I think at first I just thought of it as a way for me to write, not really thinking about anyone actually reading my work. I kept writing just to see if I would do it, and then I wrote a post that was really personal. It was the first time I actually put my heart out on the line for the world to see, and people read it and responded. It became an addiction.
That very personal posting changed my world. It drew people back into my life, it connected me to friends I had yet to meet, it gave me a voice. It created in me a desire to write more often, to bare my soul on a regular basis and gave me a point of contact with all of you. It was my cornerstone. The cornerstone of what I hope will become my future writing career.
So, why do I write? Well, the answer is simple. I write because I have to. I need the outlet for the joys and the sorrows of my life. I need the space to write out my thoughts and come to conclusions for the situations and circumstances in my own life. I write from a purely selfish stance, it is therapy for me. That you might read something and find inspiration or connect with me in an emotion is just gravy on the side. I write because to not write would be to lose a part of myself. I write to record my daily life as a wife and a mother and friend. I write to immortalize those I love, to show them off to the world the way a photographer would show the world his photographs, or a painter would auction off his paintings. I am proud of my life, I am proud of those around me, I want you to know them too. I want you to share in my pride. I write because I can do nothing else.
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Friday, June 12, 2009
How?
How do YOU read this blog? Do you subscribe to it through Google or Blogline readers, do you visit another blog and connect to me from there, did you Google search on a certain word and find me, or is it bookmarked in your favorites? I often wonder how you get to me each day.
Wondering how you find me, causes me to wonder how I find inspiration. It comes from so many different places; my family, my friends, friends of friends, the dogs in my life, my church, my work, television, radio, photographs. Often I get inspiration from other bloggers or social network websites, the writing muse that sits on my shoulder grabs tidbits from all around my world.
The process of capturing that one particular thought or idea, forming it into sentences and pouring it out so that you can read it and better yet, understand it is a gift that I truly do not know how to explain. There are days that I struggle to get one sentence written and days when I sit to write and it is as if a portal has been opened and a flood of words come sailing onto the page. Happy days often do not bring a plethora (I used that word just for my Daddy!!) of words and thoughts, it is most often the sadder moments of my life or the lives of those around me that seem to pull out the work I am most proud of on this blog. Sometimes I have wondered why I even named the blog "Happy In The Moment"...for it seems that a lot of what I share has its roots in sadness or discontentment, but truly, the title still fits for me. I am always the eternal optimist. I strive to find happiness in the moments of my life, even the sad moments. When I stop doing that, I will have lost all hope.
I don't have a good answer for the "how" of the process of writing, at least not one that works for me tonight. I wonder each time I pull up the blog and open a blank screen if anything worthy of reading will appear at the end of the writing session. Some days I end the session with a mediocre attempt at giving you a glimpse into my heart and my world, and then other days I end it knowing that I have given the effort one hundred percent of my best and I am proud to have gotten out of the way and allowed my writing muse to do its work. (Oh, and by the by, it just took me about ten minutes to end that sentence because I got caught up in trying to determine if my writing muse is male or female. As you see, I chose a non-gender...but I really think it is a "he" - and that is strange to me...I may be turning into an eccentric writer after all.)
The answer to the question of "how" is unanswerable, except for this; what I write, however inspired by the events of the day or the past or the future or the people in my life or even just a photograph, is from my heart. There is not a sentence or a paragraph that is not thought through, edited and rewritten and agonized over at least a tiny bit. I can't explain how I write anymore than I can explain how I love or how I dream or how I breath. It is just all a part of me.
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Thursday, June 11, 2009
Where?When?
I write this blog from my kitchen table. I sit, day or night and gaze out my bay window in my breakfast nook. If it is morning, my eyes are filled with the greenery of the trees and grass of my backyard and most days the blue, blue Georgia sky. Every morning, at least for the past month, there is a lizard that appears on my deck, climbs up the brick and peers in the window. He likes to watch me type, and every now and then he pulses out his neck and shows off for me. I am not really of fan of the creepy, crawly creatures God created, but I am growing quite attached to my early morning friend.
If the inspiration for writing comes upon me at night, I find my view vastly changed out my window. It is eerily dark, no lights other than a smattering of stars or at times the moon and its shadows playing in the tree line. I hear the barking of the dogs and the crickets, other than that, the air is still and quiet.
Sometimes I wish I had a writing room. A space with a desk and a lamp and maybe a cd player. A place to call my own, perhaps a bulletin board to post a few random thoughts or pictures to inspire me. I wish it sometimes, but then as I sit here and listen to the sounds of life, watch the beauty of nature within arm's grasp, and my family bustling all around, I realize that I could not write in the solitude of that pined away for space. Even when I am feeling a bit of writer's block, weary of writing another word or feel that the muse for my writing has gone and left me, I know that at the comfort of my kitchen table, well worn with the marks of a life lived these past seventeen years, there is no other place I would rather be, than here, writing my heart out for all to read, from the heart of my home.
Enjoy your day!
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
Well, At Least It Is A New Post!
Yesterday Hannah and I had a terrific day with our friends Lisa and K. The girls began private tap lessons while Lisa and I enjoyed an hour of child free bliss floating in their pool. After the lesson, the girls joined us and we spent the remainder of the day swimming. Okay, so we did take a break for some lunch and inside playtime away from the sun but we jumped back in the pool around 3 PM and spent a couple of more hours pretending to be fish. It was a glorious way to spend a hot summer day. I am so glad we will get to spend Tuesday like this throughout the summer. Such fun.
My husband is off work today so we have spent the morning watching the girl jump through a sprinkler, throwing sticks for the dogs and a riding the golf cart. Tonight we are eating out at a new restaurant.
Are you still awake? I hope you haven't hit your head on the computer keyboard...this post is boring me...so bless your heart for reading this so far.
My writer's block is not allowing me to write anything poetic or prolific today...I am relying on the crutch of a daily recap. Thanks for reading, even this random silly post, and I promise to be back tomorrow with, hopefully, a more inspiring piece!
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
ScoobyDoobyDoooooooooooooooo!
This morning I happened to be on her side of the house and decided to do a little bathroom cleanup. The bathroom of a four year old can be a scary place!! There are snakes and lizards and bugs of all sorts of creepiness and crawliness that live in the bathtub, and lately some have made their way to the sink area...it demands constant attention. My child is a creepy, crawly, buggy fanatic these days.
After I had picked up all the "creatures" and deposited them into the tub, closed the shower curtain and tried to find the humor, I decided to tackle the toilet. I lifted the lid and this is what I found...
Yep, that is Scooby Doo! Hannah set it up this way so that every time anyone lifts the lid they will get a hello wave from Scooby!! I kid you not. I cannot make this stuff up.
Hope you have a scooby-dooby-doo day!
Living Happily in the Moment!
Bev
Monday, June 8, 2009
HAPPY JUNE 8th!!!
I lost my grandfather on you many years ago and got my first heartbreak on another of your days. I can't see the date on the calendar without cringing just a bit. I try to put it out of my mind, and I usually don't dwell, because, after all, the past is the past. But still, every year on June 7th, I prepare my heart just a little. It seems the pain of loss, though it may subside with time, never really goes away. There is always a little mark on our soul, isn't there?
Today could be a sad day if I let it. I am choosing not to allow that to happen. There are happy moments to be found in this day and I am going to go out with my child and soak up some happiness and sunlight. I am going to laugh and sing loudly in the car. As my daughter says, "watch out world, here I come!"
I am going to be thankful for the years I had with my grandfather and the joy that was mine to have a PaPa. I am going to eat some peanuts with my little girl and tell her all about him. I am going to wander out to my husband's shop and remember doing the same thing when I was young and would go watch my grandfather work in his shop. I am going to be happy for the memories today and not sad for the loss.
I may allow myself to listen to a few songs from my past but I know that I am going to be thankful for the fun times spent with a great guy, for all the growth and challenges that time in my life brought me and for the friend that I have now because of it. Today,I will celebrate the memories and not be sad for the what-ifs. (by the way, I always tell my husband that his lucky numbers are 0608...and he should celebrate this day every year as his luckiest day...hee hee!!)
So, today might be all about remembering, but remembering with a smile and not a tear! No, no tears today. Happy June 8th everyone! Happy June 8th! Get out and enjoy the day.
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Sunday Sampler: Patience, A Work in Progress
Just this past week I was given that sweet opportunity to sit by the ocean, dip my toes in the water, and watch as my troubles floated away with the tide. The visit to the seaside was made sweeter by the fact that it was at dusk, my favorite time of the day. The colors were softer, the air was milder, the sea birds were plentiful and called out evening greetings, and everyone seemed to have a smile on their face. It was easy to relax, and hard to be anxious in a setting such as that.
I love the above snippet from Anne Morrow Lindbergh. Patience. That elusive trait that we all long for in ourselves and others, yet when life tries to cultivate it within us through circumstances and people, we immediately recoil and declare we don't want the lesson, thank you very much. At least that is my experience. I have had several life experiences that were seemingly contrived to teach me this patience nonsense and I was not happy with the process at all. I am not a very good student.
I remember the loss of a friend a long time ago. I always wanted that friendship back, always needed that particular face and voice back in my life. Of course, somewhere along the way, I must have prayed for the patience to endure until the end, because it took a lot of years for that to happen. Even though it was not a constant state of anxiousness, just a nagging thought and prayer at the end of each day, those were not easy years of waiting. Thankfully today, I do have that person back in my life. The renewed friendship is in itself a reward worthy of all the painful moments in the past. But did I learn patience through all of it...I doubt it.
I am the wife of a man who is the complete opposite of me. This, I believe, is God's ultimate teaching tool in what appears to be my lifetime struggle to cultivate patience. Marriage is full of examples and opportunities to hone my patience tools...unfortunately for both of us, even after seventeen years, I still struggle with the virtue. I want him to understand me...NOW, not later. I want him to do things my way, NOW, not when he gets around to it. As you can see, life with me can be just a ball of laughter and fun. Have I learned patience through being married? Not quite yet.
All my life I had wanted to be a mom. It seemed beyond my grasp and a series of life circumstances set me on a thirteen year course to make that dream a reality. I believe I said time and time again during that wait that the people who were praying for my patience needed to stop it, and stop it immediately! My husband and I learned many lessons during this time in our life. We developed faith muscles galore and the reward of our precious daughter through the miracle of adoption opened our world up in ways too numerous to list. But patience, I don't know if I really learned it through all of this either.
I want to say that the above examples and the many others I could recite from my life have taught me that elusive virtue. I want to say it, but I am sure the comment section would be filled with notes from the people in my life who know that is not true. I am still impatient. I hate waiting on anything. Commericals during my favorite television shows are too long, I drum my fingers on the counter waiting on the microwave to bing, I buy bananas almost overly ripe because the thought of having to wait on them to ripen throws me over the edge and put me in a line of construction traffic and I throw a hissy fit every time. I want what I want, when I want it. I am a passionate person, and I am passionate about not waiting!
Although I haven't yet learned the truth of patience from my life or the time I have spent sitting by the sea, I have learned how to be calm and have faith, even of a mustard seed, in the face of life's storms. I have lived long enough and loved long enough to realize that circumstances take time to work themselves out, people need time to come around to the truth, and yes, eventually the guy holding the STOP sign in the line of construction traffic will flip it over to SLOW and I can get to my destination. I guess I am learning to be content with what I have, however impatiently I have to wait until what I want comes along.
I'm a work in progress, how about you?
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Friday, June 5, 2009
"Arms Tired, Feet Hurt!"
I find myself still saying this phrase on particularly hard days or moments in my life. I said it on Tuesday after walking all over cobblestone streets in Savannah when my husband asked if I was ready to go home..."yep, legs tired and feet hurt!"
Writing this post tonight has kinda of been like that old prom and wedding season for me. I am having a "head aches, brain tired!" evening. There are thoughts in my brain that could possibly make sense and even make a decent posting but for some reason I can't get the thoughts organized and down to my fingertips to share with you. I can only hope that tomorrow will be a better day and I will be able to write my heart once again.
It is Friday, hopefully a fabulous Friday for you and yours. I will be spending the day at a playdate with my girl and her pre-K friends. I am certain there will be lots to report at the end of this day.
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev
Thursday, June 4, 2009
Tuesday, June 2, 2009
We Searched and Searched, But There Was Not a Jiggett In Sight!
Thanks to Mom and Daddy for watching our little angel!
And don't worry if you don't know what a "jiggett" is...just rest assured, we didn't see one!
Living Happily In the Moment!
Bev