22 Years Ago Today

As I sat and listened to the Sunday sermon this morning, a question was asked "Do you know where you were 20 years ago today?" That I could not answer, but the quick glance at the bulletin to see the date gave me a reminder of where I was 22 years ago today! Being a writer means you get inspiriation from lots of sources, and when the muse strikes, you must write! This tiny blog entry was scribbled on the back of the sermon notes, oh - and then I quickly got back to paying attention to the sermon ;-) !

June 8, 1986

22 years ago today

I woke up and thought I was happy

22 years ago today

I trusted he would always be mine

22 years ago today

He yearned to be free

22 years ago today

He wanted to go another way

so then,

22 years ago today

Became the last day he was mine.

1986 was a long, long time ago. 22 years to be exact. Yet, surprisingly enough, the impact of that one little day, the seismic aftershocks of a lost first love can still sometimes be felt in my memory and my heart, even 22 years later.

Oh, the pain is not there of course, the immediate sense of loss is long gone and the heartache and sadness that followed and became my constant companions have long since journeyed on and are today just tiny bits of memory. What lingers from that fateful day 22 years ago today, is a thankfulness for the way my life has turned out, despite that day and some lessons that have served me well throughout my life.

The depths of despair, taught me who I was, what I valued, where and with whom I wanted to live out my life. The loneliness of that time taught me to depend on the True Love of my life, to seek His guidance and trust His ways, which, oh, so often, are not our ways or even our wishes. The heartache and sadness I felt taught me how to have compassion for others who are hurting and to empathize and sympathize in ways I would have never known.

June 8, 1986, it was a good day gone bad. But it was just a day. Soon June 9th and then June 10th and even July rolled around and bit by bit, the day has dwindled down through the years to just a day on an out of date calendar. I would be lying if I said that every year, I didn't remember it, just a little. But when I do, I take the time to pray for that guy that broke my heart and hope he is happy and where God wants him to be in his life. I give myself a once a year indulgence to travel down that rocky road of memories and remember. These days, perhaps because of my overwhelmingly happy life, more often than not, it is the good memories that I have found remaining... time truly does heal it all.

22 years ago today I thought my world had ended, but 22 years ago today, it had only just begun. Without that bad day so long ago, the better days of December 3, 1990 and December 3, 1991 and May 16, 1992 and September 1, 2004 would themselves just be days on an out of date calendar. Instead those are the days I met my husband, got engaged, got married and became a mom. The best days of my life.

So, June 8, 1986 - here's to ya and thanks for being my own little reminder on this road of life that bad days come and go, but always, ALWAYS better days are just around the corner.

Finally Living Happily Ever After,
Beverly