"I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you and watch over you." Psalm 32:8
Every day I walk Hannah to her kindergarten class. I like to take her little hand and stroll along the sidewalk, through the doors, down the hallways, finally arriving at her classroom door where I receive my goodbye hug and kiss. It is a great way to start the day. On Friday, this sweet morning ritual will be over for me.
Friday is Independence Day for the Kindergartners. They get to wear Red, White and Blue, and they are to be let out at the door of the school and find their way to the classroom all on their own. You can imagine how much I HATE this thought...but it is a reality that I am trying desperately to let sink into my brain and heart.
This week I have been trying to prepare her for this walk of independence. On Tuesday I walked her to the start of her hallway and today I let go of her hand a bit further away, tomorrow I will let her walk from the front door to her classroom as a test run. She has done fine, I am not really worried about her ability to find her class, but you know what...both days, I have stood back and watched just to make sure she got there.
This morning, the walk was a little longer for her and I had to wait a bit for her to turn a corner so she wouldn't see me watching. When I turned the corner she was not in sight. My first thought was "WOW, she must have run to the class!" I turned around to leave and then had a second thought, "What if she went into the wrong class?" so I went back. Of course, mommy's intuition had been right, she went to the first classroom, not the second one and as I turned back around she was leaving the first and heading to her classroom thanks to a kindly teacher giving her direction.
My heart hurt a bit, but then I realized that it is a learning process, she needed to make a mistake so that tomorrow and the next day and all the days after that she will know the right door to go to.
As I turned away to go home, the above verse stuck in my head. I had just been given a visual of what God must feel about us. We have instruction, guidance and we walk with our hand in His but eventually we pull away and walk on our own. We think we are old enough and smart enough and can make it on our own. He knows better, so He stands back and watches. And just like my little Hannah this morning, we all make a wrong turn, go through a wrong door, stumble or fall. It is my belief that God does not intervene unless we ask Him, that He is like me, standing back and watching, willing us to make the right turn. But He also provides for us, even when we don't ask and just like the teacher that was kind and pointed my girl in the right direction, He gives us people and situations in our life that can help lead us in the right way and eventually lead us back to Him.
My child went to school today, but I received the lesson!
Living Happily in the Moment!
Bev
5 comments:
I don't know why, but this made me cry!
I cried all the way through writing it...
I am definitely teary-eyed! But then again, an Allstate Insurance commerical can make me cry these days. seriously though (well, I was serious about the car ins. commerical too...) when you were writing that, i could VIVIDLY recall the first morning I had to let Amy off at the front of the school and let her walk all the way to her kindergarden class. the way you described it, and how I saw it, our schools must be designed exactly alike! (sign of some good writing there??)
I can see what Amy is wearing and see her little book bag. and that was --um, lets see, about 16 years ago??
WOW.. this one touched me...
Again, with the good stuff. Girl, you are on a roll this week. Good good stuff. I love this post. Care if I link to it? I know some readers of mine who would appreciate it. And the high quality writing, too :)
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