Four years ago today, my husband and I walked into a hospital
Four years ago today, I watched my daughter’s mother prepare for childbirth
Four years ago today, we met our Hannah Joy for the first time.
Four years ago today, it was a Wednesday.
And I became a mom.
Early on Wednesday, September 1, 2004, my husband and I got into our car and drove forty five minutes to the hospital where our hoped for child was to be born.
I remember the blackness of the night, and the pounding of my heart as we left my parents behind and took off into that blackness. At that moment, we had no idea whether we would in fact become parents that day, or whether we would come home brokenhearted.
About thirty minutes into our trip, the song “Unanswered Prayers” came on the radio. This song happened to have been “our song” years earlier when we were dating and the message then and at that particular moment was clear. The plans we had made for our lives in picking out life partners were not God’s plans and He always knew what was best for us. And this chilly morning, it was no different. We had tried to convince God to give us a child for twelve years, He had not answered that prayer, and instead, He had given us a different path to parenthood – His answer was definitely the best one. It was that song, playing at that particular time that gave us both peace in the situation. Whether we came home with a baby this time or not, He had us in His hand and the best for our lives would be whatever He wanted.
We arrived at the hospital at 5:30 AM. Soon after, Hannah’s birth mom and her friend arrived and we all spent some time together until the nurse came to prepare for the induction. Danny and I took a place in the waiting room and soon we were introduced to several members of Hannah’s birth mom’s family. We spent the rest of the morning there, with these precious people, getting to know them and them us.
At 12:41 PM, the precious bundle that would soon grace our lives was born. Because of a breathing difficulty, she was placed in the NICU. Our first glimpse of her was through a nursery window. She was long, small and had lots of hair.
Later in the afternoon, we were privileged to meet her in person, and I was able to change her first diaper and give her the first bottle. I cannot even attempt to describe the emotions of that meeting; it would not do them justice, so I will just say that it was the best moment of my life, the happiest moment of my life. All the fears of the last several days vanished and it became clear that this was God’s plan for us as well as for Hannah’s birthmother. She had such peace and showed such warmth and compassion for us that we all felt comfortable and it was easy to feel happiness in the midst of the bittersweet sadness.
For those of you who do not know the song Unanswered Prayers – the chorus is this:
Sometimes I thank God for unanswered prayers
Remember when you’re talking to the man upstairs,
That just because He doesn’t answer, doesn’t mean He don’t care
Because some of God’s greatest gifts, are
Unanswered prayers.
It truly fit that day. For so long God had not answered my prayers to be a mother, to give birth in a hospital room with my family around me. Then suddenly, on that day, I found myself in a hospital room, surrounded by family, being given the gift of motherhood by a sweet woman who loved her daughter with all her heart. It was not the labor and delivery story I would have ever written for myself, but I am so happy to claim it. God answered my prayers, and it was truly the greatest gift and very much worth the wait.
Four years ago today, it was a Wednesday, and I became a Mom.
Living Happily Ever After,
Beverly
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