It's Just Another New Year's Eve...Another Night Like All The Rest.

Now you would think that it being New Year's Eve and all, I would actually have some profound words or thoughts that might make it a more meaningful night for you out in blog land. Sorry, I have nothing! I have been reading a few bloggers who seem to have a handle on inspiration, but sadly, as of right now, I am highly uninspired and prone more to wanting to sit and watch an entire season of The Office on dvd rather than sit and wax poetic about the year that was 2009.

It wasn't a great year, it wasn't a bad year, it was just a year.

Perhaps I will miss parts of it, the sweet start of the year and the second chance it brought me, the sultry summer time spent with my child savoring every precious free moment as we awaited the start of her school career. The cool autumn breeze that blew into our lives even more changes than kindergarten for my girl, as it brought a job for me, not sought after, but much loved and much appreciated. The winter time approached bringing holidays and ultimately a bittersweet goodbye, a change in my world and my thoughts and finally, now, this night, the end of the year.

2009. A year I won't forget, it is quite unforgettable really. It taught me so much, it gave me so much, it ultimately took so much from me and it has marked my life as a before and after from now until I am no longer on this earth. I am grateful, I am glad, I have no regrets for the lessons, or the teachers or the stumbles or the getting back up and trying again. It is life.

Thank you 2009. Thank you to the people in my life that made it special, to the old friends that made it fun, to the new ones who kept me sane, to my family who loved me through it all and to you my readers for coming back here day after day even when the material wasn't worth the trip!

Happy New Year Everyone....2010, Here We Come!

Living Happily in the Moment!
Beverly

Happy New Year's Adam!

Someone told me on the day before Christmas Eve, that their family called that day Christmas Adam, cause it comes before Eve! I thought that was cute and I am thinking it can be applied to New Year's Eve as well...so HAPPY NEW YEAR'S ADAM!

We are celebrating tonight because my husband is working tomorrow night. Our New Year's Adam celebration has so far consisted of chili for dinner, some really cool fireworks that we set off in our driveway and a Super Mario Brothers Wii marathon play session to commence as soon as I get off this little blog post!

I hope you and yours have a very happy new year...I have to get on over to the tv and show some silly boy and little girl who is really BOSS around here! I totally ROCK at Super Mario!!

Living Happily in the Moment!
Beverly

One Is The Loneliest Number...

My family has been gone all weekend. I have been alone, a loner, quiet, reflective, sad, lonely, calm, blissful, bored, nesting, lazy, and did I mention ALONE! The silence has been deafening at times. Don't get me wrong, I anticipated this "alone time" and I did enjoy the full night's sleep and the few naps I was able to take and I did make a few plans so I would not turn into a hermit, but it was hard to be alone,don't tell them, but I might have missed them just a little!

I ventured out on Saturday to do a little shopping, came home, took a nap and cleaned the house from the Christmas festivities. The rest of the day and night was spent in my pj's, eating leftover hot dip and chips from Christmas and watching three movies, consecutively, uninterrupted...it was uh...heaven!!

On a side note...I have discovered that if I lived alone I would either be really skinny (cause I almost forgot to eat at all on Saturday and Sunday) and I would be really UNhealthy (cause what I did eat was J.U.N.K, I was too lazy to even make a sandwich!!) I lost all my culinary skills when it came to feeding myself!It was pitiful.

About midnight Saturday I began to get a little lonely, but I went to bed and got over that rather quickly! Sunday brought church and shopping and even a night out at the movies with my friend Stacie. By the time I made it home around 9:30...I was starting to miss the two people who usually run to greet me when I walk in the door, but as luck would have it, my Aunt called and we talked for the next two hours...so my "people" void was filled in a fun way! I got off the phone and watched another movie and then it was bedtime!

Today, after sleeping in until a rare 8 AM, I got up, fed the dogs, cleaned the house and headed out for some more shopping (shh...I got some gift cards for Christmas!!) and then I headed in town to meet an old high school friend for lunch. We reconnected over facebook (like all the rest of the world) and she was in town for the holidays. We figured out that it had seriously been twenty-five years since we had seen each other...WOW -- can we even be old enough to say that phrase? It boggles my mind. She is a wife and mom to a teenage son and she is a living my dream of being a bona fide published writer...I am proud of my friend. It is awesome to see someone reach a life long goal. I am a little jealous that she has actual books with her name on them on book shelves in actual stores, but hey, I have this little blog and you, my ever faithful readers...so I am feeling able to suppress my jealous nature, at least for a while!

My sweet two returned home to me this evening. I had the house clean, dinner cooked and there was never a more grateful wife and mom than I, to see them home, safe and sound and maybe , just maybe, even missing me a wee little bit too!

Living Happily in the Moment!
Beverly

And The Beat Goes On...

There is a certain someone that has been in my life for a while. This person means the world to me and probably, if I were truthful, holds more of my heart in their hands than anyone else I know.

I have talked "a bit" about the love of my life on this site...they are sweet, kind, giving, sometimes a bit moody and a bit stubborn, but always loving and lovable. I have learned to navigate the stormy seas that make up our relationship and the gifts and joys have greatly outweighed the sadness and stress that has accompanied our years together.

This person, the love of my life, is a drummer. A drummer who listens to the beat of their own mind, choosing to live and be in this world all on their own terms.

I know you are just dying to see a picture of this person who is the holder of my happiness and my love, I will not keep you in suspense any longer...


And did I mention SHE was in a band...it is newly formed with only my husband as the guitar player and me as the pitiful keyboardist...but we can play a mean "Jingle Bells" and my favorite rendition of "Up On the Housetop" ever!!!


;-)

Merry Day After Christmas!!
Beverly

Never Unloved!

I have been unfaithful,
I have been unworthy;
I have been unrighteous,
and I have been unmerciful.

I have been unreachable,
I have been unteachable;
I have been unwilling,
and I have been undesirable.
And sometimes, I have been unwise,
I've been undone by what I'm unsure of -

But because of You
and all that you went through,
I know that I have never been unloved.

I have been unbroken,
I have been unmended;
I have been uneasy,
and I have been unapproachable.
I have been unemotional,
I have been unexceptional;
I have been undecided,
and I have been unqualified.
Unaware - I have been unfair,
I've been unfit for blessings from above.

But even I can see
The sacrifice You made for me, to show me
that I have never been unloved.
Michael W. Smith

Yep, that pretty much sums up my year...how about you? What better time, than Christmas time to be reminded of how much we are unworthy of the greatest gift we have ever received. Jesus Christ, God in flesh, come to earth to save our sorry souls!

Merry Christmas Everyone!
From your undone, unworthy, unfaithful but oh so thankfully never unloved blogger friend!

Merry, Merry!
Beverly

Sleeping 'Neath the Tree - 2009 Style

I wrote this post two years ago. I re-posted it last year and tonight as I sit in my quiet house, gazing at my Christmas tree and thinking about the day's events, I feel compelled to post it once again.

This evening has shaped up to be one that is tailor-made for me to do a little "sleeping 'neath the tree," thinking about those I love, praying for some who have lost their way, others who are sick, still some that are struggling as I have been over the past year with life-changing decisions. My thoughts as I lay beneath my tree always lead me back to the real reason for this season. It will be my prayer that all who are brought to my mind tonight will sense Christmas in a new way this year.

Below is one of the verses that came to my mind as I prepared to sit and be quiet tonight. It has more meaning tonight than ever before. It is my prayer for you...Always!

¹² "Even now," declares the LORD,
"return to me with all your heart,
with fasting and weeping and mourning."

¹³ Rend your heart
and not your garments.
Return to the LORD your God,
for he is gracious and compassionate,
slow to anger and abounding in love,
and he relents from sending calamity." Joel 2:12,13

And now...for the original Sleeping 'Neath The Tree from 2007.

Okay, here is a fact that I can't really believe I am admitting to, much less broadcasting to the tens of people who find this blog somewhat entertaining... but here goes. At Christmas time, I sometimes leave the Christmas tree lights on all night, and sleep, on the floor, beneath the tree.

Sounds weird doesn't it? Well, I guess it is, and I guess I am too for that matter. But it is true. I even have a special blanket that I like to use - it is old and worn, but it makes a great cushion on the floor. Now, of course, I don't do this every night - just on the nights when the DH (that's short for Dear Hubby!!) is working and the DD (and that would be Dear Daughter - starting to sense a pattern here - how about you?) is fast asleep. I have been doing this for years. In Christmases past, it was me and my sweet DDJ (and for those of you who are not asleep from the boredom yet, that is Dear Dog Jake) who used to snuggle down for a long winter's nap under the tree. Some years, we were privileged to be sleeping under a real tree, dodging falling needles and reveling in the sappy, sweet smell of Christmas and all it's glory. Since we have lived in this house, the tree has always been artificial (but a beauty!) and although it is not quite as "smelly" and "sappy", it still is a favorite place. Now that DDJ has gone onto Doggie Heaven, and until my DD is old enough to play along with me, I guess it is just going to be me, sleeping 'neath the tree for awhile longer.

The idea of sleeping 'neath the tree came from a long time ago. No, not my childhood, long ago, but oh, let's just say a good twenty years back. Before the DH and the DD, there was another somebody -- he is commonly known on this blog as Maskboy, now STOP - don't go thinking this is an old boyfriend blog entry -- it ain't - just keep reading!

Anyhoo, as my mother always says, once upon a time, near Christmas, this "person" came to my house, and at sometime, during the course of the evening, I guess he was tired, cause he fell asleep beneath our tree. Now, most folks would find this rude, but as he was soon to be (or so I thought) a member of the family, my parents and I thought it endearing. So, ever the documenter of my life and times, my mother snapped a photo of the sleeping one beneath the tree.

Over time that picture became one of my favorites of him. Even now, oh so many years later, and a lifetime between that time and this, I still think it is a favorite, not just of him, but a favorite picture of all that are in my photo album. It doesn't even show his face, in fact, it could be anyone under that tree. What I think I like about it so much is the child-like quality the picture portrays. Who hasn't been a child, so excited about Christmas that you want to climb under the tree and wait for Santa. Can't you just picture a small child doing that, and then falling asleep with the hope and wonderment of what is to come on his little mind?

That is the feeling I am after, on those nights, when alone, I make a pallet on my floor, fluff my pillow, and settle in under my tree. The feeling that many years ago, as a young wife, longing to be a mother, and feeling alone at the holidays, I tried to find. That feeling, that even now, I still long to find. To see the wonder of Christmas, not through these jaded adult eyes, but through the eyes of a child, to sit in awe as the The Christmas Story is read from Luke, or sit in a darkened church, lit by candles and sing quiet carols on Christmas Eve and to wait with wonder on Christmas morning, walk in and see what goodies are laid out for me.

Christmas is a special time of year for me as I know it is for everyone. There is so much wrapped up in this month of December. I dated my husband for the first time in a December long ago and accepted his ring a year later on another cold December day. I have spent far too many Christmases saddened because of loss but I am so blessed that now I have spent three wonderful Christmases with my sweet daughter. I am so excited to spend another one this year and to experience Christmas and all it's wonders through her eyes once again. How sweet to hear her sing "Away in the Manger" or "Fa la la, Tis the Season to be Jolly", as only a three year old can. What fun to act out the Christmas story with her playing the director, and acting out Mary, the Angel and Baby Jesus - and I am just lucky to be a sheep! Such fun, such fun, ya'll, there are no words to express it!

I wholeheartedly recommend that you take some time this year, maybe not a whole night, like crazy ole me, but maybe just a few moments, 'neath the tree. Take the time to ponder the child-like moments of Christmases past, the one that is here now and the ones yet to come. See them from 'neath the tree - it is a whole new perspective. Somehow, beneath a tree, decorated with all the glitz and glam, the real meaning of the season comes into focus. At least for me it does.

Merry, Merry!
Beverly

The Gingerbread Dream House of 2009

For YEARS my mom and I have been creating gingerbread houses at Christmas time. We did it first for one of my nieces and loved it so much we started a tradition. For a few years we made our own gingerbread, cut out the pieces per the pattern and decorated it with our own homemade icing and store bought candies. Later, we started to use the kits that are so prevalent in the stores this time of year. Sometimes we had success...most of the time we did not. It seems that each year as we are building our gingerbread dream house, we aspire to how we can do it bigger and better next year. We have had grandiose ideas and visions of entering some gingerbread contest and taking home the blue ribbon. These ideas and vision have never really come to fruition, but we have had fun talking about it as we decorate the smaller, less grand version in front of us.

When my daughter came along, we finally had an even bigger and more fun reason to build the gingerbread house of wonders...the delight in seeing her little eyes light up was more enough to entice us to building the house each year. Except the past five years, although filled with love and all the patience we can muster, our gingerbread houses have just been catastrophes. The icing has been too thick, too thin, the sides have fallen in, roofs have caved, doors have fallen off and figurines have refused to stand up in the "yard." My daughter has delighted in the disasterous masterpieces, we have been disgusted!

This year however our gingerbread house turned out quite well. Not as good as some in years past, but definitely better than the last four we have created for my child. She was an actual help this year ( unlike last year, when she just commenced to eating the candies!) and even created a door for us when we were clueless as to how best it could be achieved.

Here are some pictures of the work in progress:

Okay...every masterpiece has to start out looking pitiful...I am pretty sure that is a direct quote from Leonardo DiVinci!

(those cans are the secret to a successful house...just sayin'!)

Two great engineers at work...

It is getting there...be patient!

And Viola'! Well worth the wait...here it is the Gingerbread Dream House of 2009!


And there is no better way to celebrate a successful house building than with some Kool-Aid and a Chocolate Snowman!
May your days be merry and bright!
Beverly

Holding Hands and Beholding Lights!

About nineteen years ago I accepted a Saturday night date with a boy I had taken a shine to about three months earlier. I chased him until he caught me...hee hee...not really, but it is funny to say! We really chased each other...it was a mutual thang!

Our first date was dinner and then a trip to a town about forty miles north of us where each holiday season a Christmas light extravaganza took place. A piece of property not far off the highway was completely made over in lighted homemade Christmas scenes, the air was filled with taped Christmas music blaring from speakers set high in trees and there was hot chocolate and marshmallows for roasting. We went there with a group of mutual church friends, but by the time we left, we were a couple. He held my hand as we walked through the gate and nineteen years later, it is still fun to walk around, looking at Christmas lights and hold his hand.

We continued this tradition of going to this particular place for a few years even after we were married and then sadly it closed due to a failing economy and some ne'er do wells who vandalized the place time and time again. My hubby and I were quite sad. We had always pictured bringing our children to the place and telling them each year how "this is where it all started." Torturing them with a yearly trek back in time to our younger days.

When our sweet Hannah was about one, the Christmas Light fairy smiled again upon our family and a similar piece of property opened up about half a mile from our home. We went the first year and the second and the third and now tonight...the fourth. Santa is there, there is a hayride through a forest filled with lighted Christmas scenes. There is hot chocolate and marshmallows for roasting, Candyland for the children to play and a Christmas Tree Maze that boggles the mind. It is a new family Christmas tradition, with roots deep in our old tradition.

Tonight as we rode along, the cold wind in our face, the shouts of an excited little girl sitting between us, my husband and I reached out at the same time and grabbed each other's hand. We had the same memory, at the same time of a long ago December night, when the cold wind forced two young people to huddle close and hold hands for the first time. No matter how tough life can get, no matter how hard marriage is, there is indeed something to be said for being able to reach out and hold the hand of someone who holds all the same memories!

Here is the child of that couple who walked hand in hand so long ago...talking to the man who is gonna hop down the chimney in a few days and make all her wishes come true...And here is that same child who will one day meet her own Prince Charming with a hand to hold, ride away and break her daddy's heart!!
But until that day comes, I am confident that we will continue to take her to this place (or one similar!) and torture her with our story...year after year!

Living Happily in the Holiday Moments!
Beverly

A Festivus for the Rest of Us!

Tonight was the annual Christmas Extravaganza that happens every year with our family and our very good friends, Tony, Lisa and Kaitlyn. We always get together during the holidays to enjoy some snacks, hot chocolate and view Christmas lights and even get in a little gift exchanging as well.

They live in a neighborhood...unlike us way out here in the sticks...so we load up the car with goodies, load up our trailer with the golf cart and blankets and after a snacky supper, we pile in the golf carts and have a light tour of the homes in their neighborhood. It is quite fun. After we get bone cold, we end up back at their house and partake in some hot chocolate and watch as the gift madness overtakes our children.

Tonight was no different. Sweet girls, and they both got a Barbie something...ours is a Barbie with a dog that poops and Kaitlyn got one that has her very own hair salon. Barbie has changed a lot since I knew her!

Here is a picture of the two daddies, doing what they do best...waiting on their daughters' every whim! (actually they were trying to get the Barbies' out of their packages...and twist ties, and all the other packaging secrets they use to keep them in their box!! AGHH!)

We had fun...it was a blast...and best of all, I got a new Coke ornament for my tree!! I love it when my friends know me so well.

Merry Merry!
Bev

The Reason for My EVERY Season

In case you didn't already know this...I love this girl! She is the glue that holds it all together for me even when inside it feels like it is all coming apart! She was my "date" last night to my work party and a friend snapped this picture of us. We had fun...can you tell?


Living Happily in the Moment!
Beverly

Merry Merry

Just wanted to say..

Merry Christmas!

It's a Day...Let's Just Call it Tuesday!

Happy December 15th. Hope it is a great day for you all.

Living Happily in the Moment!
Beverly

So this is Christmas...

Welcome!

You are being greeted by my newest Snowman added to my Snowman collection on my tree. He is an Irish Snowman...cause, you know...my Irish eyes are a smilin'!



This is my foyer - the foyer table is actually my husband's grandmother's vanity...here is where all the Christmas cards you send me come to rest. Also, please note the wooden nutcracker statue, this was painted lovingly by my child...in honor of the first ever time she saw The Nutcracker! It has been a big deal in her world this Christmas!

This cute gingerbread couple made an appearance a few years ago and my daughter thought they needed to rest on my bookcase this year, under the handprint Christmas tree she created last year in pre-K. She has the Christmas decorating style this year...

Now, typically, this Christmas china that I started collecting way back in 1992 would be out on the dining room table by now, all ready for some scrumptious eats on Christmas morning. But this year, I have been a little slow in the ironing of my tablecloth and such, so it is still housed safely in the china cabinet...but I still wanted you to see it...ain't it pretty?

Before we travel any further, I wanted you to see the fireplace. I really love it now that I have a new mirror and new paint on the walls. I fully intend to have a fire glowing warmly in here before the year is up!


Come on into the kitchen...here is my Coca-Cola tree. I keep gaining ornaments for it, maybe next year it will become a full size tree...here's hoping!!

Each year I try to find one or two new items to add to my house hold decorations...this year, I found these adorable placemats and just had to indulge...aren't they sweet? Everyone say...awww!!




Here is Mr. Freckles (our fish) all dressed up for Christmas.



A visit just would not be complete with a little snack to take home with you. Here is my crockpot candy...I am making a big batch, but here is some that I made yesterday...just for you! Enjoy and thanks for stopping by. My family hopes you and yours enjoy a wonderful and merry Christmas!

Decking the Halls; Where Less is More!

For the past few years I have participated in a bloggy style Christmas Tour of Homes. It is great fun and a neat way to peek into the lives and homes and traditions of other bloggers like myself.

This year is no different,I will participate tomorrow, but I wanted to forewarn you. My decorations are scaled back this year. We have the big tree, my child has a tree, the mantle is decked and there are bits and pieces of Christmas here and there...but nothing like years past.

I want to be more festive, I just haven't been able to get to that place inside of my head yet. I am far behind in the shopping for gifts, I have long since run out of gift ideas for those I love and quite frankly the whole thought of it is overwhelming and exhausting. I sound whiny...but I really am not. I am not complaining... just stating some fact...I don't feel the Christmas yet.

This afternoon, after a wonderfully long nap, I sat and caught up on some of my favorite blogs. This post by Beth Moore struck a chord with me. Now, granted, she is recovering from surgery and not really able to decorate and shop and such, but her thoughts on a simpler celebration moved me. Perhaps that is what my heart has been shouting to me this season. Maybe I have subconsciously cut short the decorations in order to help my already cluttered heart and mind focus on the real meaning of Christmas year.

So tomorrow, when you see my Christmas house tour, please keep in mind that although the garland and ribbon and sparkle is at a minimum around here, I am hoping the truth of Christmas will be more in focus and decking our halls more this season than ever before.

Living Happily in the Holiday Momenst!
Beverly

Silent Night

Someone in my family knows just how much I love "sleeping neath the tree!" She was posing for me...but it is still the cutest thing in the world!

Have a very merry Saturday!

Living Happily in the Holiday Moments!
Beverly

Scars

Remember two years ago, when shortly before Christmas I did this?

It blows my mind to think it has been TWO years...quite honestly, I thought it had only been one year and when I went back to look in the archives of this blog...I found it had been TWO! WOW!

Well, back to my point, and yes, Virginia, there is a point to this blog post.

After I "grated" my thumb and walked around for weeks and weeks with a horrendous cut and tightly wrapped bandage, I just knew the remnant of my bad cooking experience would always be with me. I knew as soon as that bandage finally came off, that forever, I would look at my thumb and see a hideous scar. I figured it would be the first thing anyone ever noticed about my hands from then on. No need to ever paint my nails or use lotion to make them soft and supple...the scar would detract from any ring or even bracelet I might wear. I was doomed to wait hopelessly for winter every year so I could done a pair of gloves and hide the ugliest scar in the universe from the world, at least for a bit. (Drama? Did someone call me a drama queen? Bite your tongue -- I speak nothing but the truth!!)

Yes, that is truly how I felt, but you know what...when the bandage came off, the scar was not that bad. It was actually more of a little ridge on my thumb. Probably not even noticed by the person sitting next to me, or the cashier as she took my check at Wally World, or my friends or even my family who knew of the accident.

And for two years now, I have just ignored it. Sometimes during church as I sat quietly for that one hour every week I might notice the bump and stroke my other thumb across it. Sometimes I wished it gone, but really, most of the time, it was of no consequence...at least not the glaringly obvious scar I had once feared.

This past Sunday morning as I was sitting in church, my sweet child laying in my lap, I glanced at my hand and noticed my scar...was gone.

There is basically no visible bump or ridge or scar left on my hand. Time has worn it down, or blended it in, or whatever the human body does to ease the ravages we wage on ourselves.

It struck me that sometimes that is how it goes with scars. We have a deep wound, we bandage it and baby it and protect it while it heals. Once healed we learn to live with the scar left by the wound. Depending on the scar, we might conceal it with clothing, hair, makeup, a tattoo, a piece of jewelry, anything to lessen the stares of those around us. We eventually learn to stop noticing it ourselves, it simply becomes a part of us, our story, who we are and the pain which brought it to us is forgotten. And then one day, if we are even luckier, the scar fades. The naked eye can't even see where it used to be. All that is left is clean, clear flesh. Uncut, unseared, unmarked.

I am thankful for all of my scars, the seen and the unseen, the still visible and the faded ones. They connect the lines of my story, they are the foundation underneath my exterior. I am not who I am without them.

Living Happily in the Moment!
Bev

We Baked...

Hannah and I baked Christmas cookies this afternoon. We also watched Rudolph and Frosty and a turkey pot pie!! (the turkey pot pie had nothing to do with Christmas...it was just supper!)

We are taking in the children's Christmas program at church tonight...I do believe the Christmas spirit has hit this little house on the lane!! And since she wouldn't let me take a picture of her and the cookies... here is one taken this morning before church...just Hannah and Mr. Freckles (did I mention we have a new fish?)
Living Happily in the Holiday moments!
Beverly

Let There Be Peace On Earth...

Tonight was the Kindergarten Christmas Program.

My child was a Christmas elf.She was the cutest elf on the stage!

They sang songs.
Beautiful renditions of "Rudolph the Red Nosed Reindeer" and "Frosty the Snowman" and "We Wish You a Merry Christmas" and the finale was "Let There Be Peace on Earth."

These people showed up.They may have been a little proud of the little elf.

And of course we were just a tad proud of her ourselves...
Living Happily in the Holiday Moment!
Beverly

Ho, Ho, Ho...

So...I guess I cannot deny it any longer. Christmas is upon us. My house is decorated (for the most part!) and there are Christmas carols playing on the radio. Tonight "Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer" comes the t.v. and I have even bowed to peer pressure and "decorated" this ole blog for the holidays.

My child has requested that we post pictures on the "internext" of our trees. So in the interest of making my sweet girl happy...here ya go!


Our "big" snowman tree...

Hannah's Pink Princess tree...

Living Happily in the Holiday Moment!
Beverly